Thursday, 11 December 2014


30 thoughts from women in their 20s

I have no idea what I want to do with my life, in fact I’m going to sit here, ponder over it and eat chocolate and Doritos until I decide. Every night.

Saturday night clubbing? I would much rather sit in with a mug of tea, eating marshmallows, watching Saturday night TV and crying over the fact I don’t look like Cheryl Cole while squeezing the excess flab on my stomach.

I have definitely worked men out. I haven’t. Why is he such an idiot. I hate him. Where’s the Doritos?

Am I too old for Disney films? ........................ No.

Look at that huge pile of washing. I’ll do it tomorrow.

This bedding needs washing. Erm, I’ll do it tomorrow.

Why haven’t I washed my bedding for 3 weeks!?

How many chocolate HobNobs exactly is it acceptable to eat from this pack?

Calories don’t count if they are someone else’s chips.

How exactly does a pension work and do I need life insurance yet? Life insurance is a few quid a month?

That’s my box of Yorkshire Tea. No can do.

Of course I can afford this round of drinks Mum *PLEASE DON’T DECLINE, PLEASE DON’T DECLINE*

Seriously how do people afford the clothes out of this Glamour Magazine, that scarf is more than my monthly wage. I WILL ALWAYS BE POOR!

I hate men.

How many glasses is it acceptable to have in my bedroom?

Is it acceptable to eat this leftover pizza for breakfast? Totally.

I obvs don’t need to go to the gym today, because, well, I walked out for my lunch.

Taking the lift to 1st floor. Sorry, not sorry.

White wine has the same calories as a jam doughnut!? I will never look like a Victoria’s Secret model!

At what point does someone actually become an alcoholic? I mean, just out of curiosity like.

Back when I was a kid...

Oh god I am getting old, even 13 year olds think I’m uncool.

Actually no, I do not NEED this bag of Haribo. I am a strong, confident woma... oooh gummy bears.

Hang on, is that a grey hair!? Where’s the Doritos again?

You know, I totally understand Bridget Jones’ pain *picks up the vodka, singing all by myself while stroking my cat*

Oh fab, paid £50 of my student loan off. Just another £20950 to go!

Remind me why I did a degree again?

Top-knot, sheep pyjamas and Cookie Monster top to bed. My milkshake knows how to bring the boys to the yard.


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